haha..put this post one day forward. it's actually the 24th today. cos i din wan it to merge with the post earlier...
i really haf no idea why i keep thinking abt it again and again. it is really annoying k~ even it is so long ago. and yet again i still blame myself! =( wth. i'm a mad person. even things arent my fault, i will still feel guilty abt it...so weird ar, me...i put the total blame on myself. cos i was scolded. and tt made me think that i was really in the wrong. but nobody stood up for me. not even jm. she still scold me some more for being so straightforward. said that i was dumb and cold-hearted. so i was not sensitive enuff?? ok lar..i AM stupid. cant manage human relationship. tt's a failure. ok..indirectly, i'm pointing to myself that i'm a failure. ok..i sux can? even though it's over...loooong over...loonngg over. wad i dun understand is, how cum it doesnt affect me right after it happen? erm...i shld get on with life man~actually i knew that day would come, it was juz a matter of time and how long i wanted to face reality and go on lying to myself...

utterly...